Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Hall of Fame #1: 1971 Buick Riviera



As an aside, allow me to introduce my "Hall of Fame" feature. The notion here is to pay tribute to a certain design that meets the following criteria:
  1. Design must have been under-appreciated in my opinion, either now or when released.
  2. Automotive topics will be given preference, but other designs may be considered.
  3. Design may be classic or contemporary.
  4. Designs of all nations will be considered, but it is likely I will focus more on American designs.
I will then attempt to analyze the cultural, technological and historical (if it is classic) effects of the design. I do not attempt to be evenhanded. My opinions will taint these pages regardless of any attempts I make to correct for them. However, if you think you can actually read anything apart from raw data without seeing opinions or point of view, I have a very nice bridge in Brooklyn that you might be interested in buying.

Let me try to give you an allegory. The American car industry from the dawn of the 1949 OHV V8 to the shameful redesigns of 1977-1979 is like a roller coaster ride. From 1949 to 1961 we weren't looking at too much in the way of sheer performance. Relative to the tepid six-cylinder cars of before, the early V8s in c. 1955 were certainly exciting, but this is so subjective, I'd say it's akin to Amish people claiming a roller coaster is exciting even when going slowly in a straight line. Compared to a horse-drawn carriage, they're right. But this is such a myopic overall picture that I'm not very interested in 1950s performance. I am somewhat a fan of 1950s styling, but I find '60s styling to be greatly superior.

We had some exceptions, of course. Chrysler's best Hemi engines were definitely potent in the 1950s. But the 1955 300, capable as it was of over 130 mph, was incredibly expensive, rare, and not very visually impressive to my eyes. They got better with the 300C in 1957 (coinciding with the excellent Forward Look styling motif) but I've simply never been that interested in Chrysler. Sorry, fanboys.

In '61 we had the first performance big-block from Chevrolet: the 409. Immortalized in Beach Boys song, this was a beastly engine in any application. Let's say this is the first bit of turbulence on the ride. Then in 1964 with the GTO the floodgates were opened; this is when the coaster has crested and is coming down the final, biggest peak on the ride. It picks up speed. We're looking at the brutish mid-60s flurry of muscle cars. We progress through the Charger and the Chevelle SS and the Boss Mustangs and end probably with the 1970 Camaro Z/28, lacking a big block but probably with the best performance of them all.

If you aren't a fan of big, long American cruising machines, you've probably been given a bad taste in your mouth from sources that shouldn't have been allowed access to this kind of emotional response from you. Yes, I know about "donks" and "pimpmobiles" and all of the stupid trends in automotive customization. It makes me weep to see another good Caprice or Roadmaster ruined. But this shouldn't taint your opinion of the original cars. Repeat after me: longer, lower, wider. When the originals are given a standard suspension and 14" or 15" wheels, as they originally had when new, they look immediately classy. When they keep all their original trim and chrome, and are given a realistic paint color (not gloss metallic green or purple), they look instantly respectable and imposing. At least, that's how I feel about it.

This has nothing to do with black or white culture. Remember that when new, all Americans were like this, and that's what all Americans drove at the time. I don't care if most classic Impalas seem to be bought up for use in rap videos. And just because I'm white doesn't mean I'm crazy about pickup trucks or imported cars.
Original 1964 Buick Riviera. This will not be the subject of a Hall of Fame post because it is VERY highly appreciated.
The Riviera was always a stunner from the moment it came out in 1964. It was staggeringly pretty in profile, and this was backed up by a good Buick interior, loads of nifty options, and relatively good performance. Internationally it might be more revered than domestically; we Americans tend to prefer those designs with more chrome and some fussy exterior touches, but the clean lines of the Riviera were appreciated by foreign audiences as an exemplar of what was good about American design. But who cares what the Europeans think? In my mind, the best was yet to come.

 Thing is, going back to the analogy, when it's 1970 on your roller coaster ride, it's already flat. You're traveling on built-up inertia of speed. There is nothing that causes you to go faster; very soon you start to appreciate the speed is diminishing.  If we want to accurately model the American car industry, we might need to put some kind of governor or speed hill in the coaster at about 1972-1974. Far from slowing down gradually, the ride was jarringly braked to a virtual standstill relative to how fast it had previously moved.


What's the consolation when performance goes out the window? Luxury comes into style. How convenient that the crop of early 1970s cars were so perfectly designed to look imposing and imperial at low speed. I am not a fan of 1970s performance (is anyone, really?) but for the early part of the decade, I like the styling that was going on. You can find very poor exemplars of this era, like the Stutz Blackhawk.

Or you could look at a good exemplar, like the 1971-1973 Buick "boattail" Riviera. When Buick put together a new Riviera for the 70s, they correctly predicted that bigness is in style, and that a luxurious appearance was crucial.


Performance was rarely a strong point of Buicks, but they had shown at decade's end that they could use their 455 big-block to pep up the Buick Gran Sport. In GSX form, with 360 hp and 510 ft-lb of tire-shredding torque, this is considered one of the fastest-ever muscle cars, although extremely rare and expensive. Just a few hundred of them were made. Selling something this raucous would always be a little unusual for Buick dealers, who normally peddled semi-posh boats to moderately successful, wrinkly old men and women.

It was actually a very auspicious time for a new Riviera, because on the power front they had access to the highly potent Buick 455 big-block. As I just explained, it was one of the truly potent motors of the age. Unfortunately, it was down to 255 net hp in the standard car by 1971, 265 with Gran Sport option. This dropped to 225 hp (with 250 in the Gran Sport) for 1972. Then for 1973, in opposition to the wholesale surrender around them, Buick engineers conquered some more power from their detuned V8, resulting in standard 250 hp for that year.

Sounds pretty bad, especially in a car weighing 4300 lb. But actually it wasn't bad at all. By mid-decade, very few engines were even breaking the 200-hp mark. Buick's rival car from Ford, the Lincoln Mk IV, laughably rated at 365 gross horsepower in 1972, was actually down to a flaccid 212 hp by 1973 under net measurements, and it would get worse in subsequent years. Performance in the big Riv was among the best full-size coupes of the decade. Doing 0-60 in 8.5 seconds was not bad in a car weighing over two tons, especially for the Seventies.

Another great advantage was that this car could have the design flair of 60's GM stylists without yet coming up against the monstrous black 5-mph bumpers that tended to ruin all cars in 1974 and later years. This design flows from the pen of a pre-embargo optimist, and betrays no second thoughts, apologies, or subtleties. This car is not downsized, federalized, or internationalized in any way. It is simply old-school American design allowed to run free. Look at the side view and see how the dip in the door is turned upwards with a neatly flowing kink that matches the bulging rear fender. It's practically perfect. The front end is handsome without being over-the-top aggressive like most muscle cars.

Best design feature of all was the evocative "boat-tail" rear end. Reminiscent of the gorgeous Auburn 851 Speedster of the 1930s and the Corvette Sting Ray in 1963-1967, in my opinion there has never been a better place for such a rear end than on the big Riviera. Although the designers balked at the corporate decision to increase the width and length of their original design while still using the same body panels, the final result looks as though it was always intended that way.

The most depressing thing about the design was that Americans simply did not appreciate it. It still sold moderately, riding on the coattails of previous models, but the styling tended to put off traditional Buick buyers who would have traded up to a Riviera if it had simply been more conservative. Ironically, if they had been this conservative in the 1964 when the first Riviera had been released, even that stunner might not have gotten off the ground.

If you ever see one of these on the road or parked, it's a chance to remind yourself that they once really did make cars 19 feet long with only two doors. And that there was a time when someone bought a new car knowing it would only carry one or two people, and yet deliver 8 mpg. Think of how much it hurts the current owner's wallet to fill up that tank at $3.70 per gallon. Please doff your hat to the person driving it. That owner is sacrificing quite a lot in order to have that style displayed in front of your eyes.

I would like to own something like this, but it's so nostalgic that even a guy as old-fashioned as me cannot relate. I wouldn't have space to park it, and I can't afford $150 a week on gasoline. But if you're braver than me, tidy examples of this car are available for under 10 grand. And for less than the price of any number of garden-variety 1967 Camaros or Mustangs with base V8s, you could have a cream puff big-block boat-tail Riviera with a much nicer interior and all the options. The Camaro might be slightly prettier, but not by much, and that's saying a lot.


This is a rare example of contemporary reviewers gushing over the '72 Riv. But it's mainly about performance and luxury, not looks. Oh well. Yet more reasons that this was a pretty great car.